How to Keep a Success Mindset and Handle
Setbacks Like a Queen
A lot of women keep themselves out of the game, because on some level we all know that once you’re sitting at the table, there will inevitably be moments when your chips are down.
Handling these down moments is just as important as hitting the jackpot. The inner work we do when we’re feeling less than, bummed out or frustrated is essential to finding success, as a spiritual person, business woman, mother and every other role we women play.
I’ve certainly faced plenty of “chips are down” moments in building my business, from trying to sell a $497 teleclass to a 5000 person list and having only 5 people purchase, to more expensive challenges like hiring 5 big name speakers, paying equally big speaker fees and hotel costs, booking a 200 person ballroom and getting only 30 people to come to the event. I’ve received long, critical emails from clients and made just about every mistake in the book when it came to hiring and leading a team. And in creating my brand, I’ve worked with numerous (and high-priced) graphic designers who just could not seem to nail my logo, and suffered through website shame for years while comparing my online presence to those with gorgeous design.
Believe me, the list could go on, and though now I can look back and either laugh or at least be grateful for the lessons I’ve learned, it has taught me a lot about the process of never giving up. Through program flops, launch failures, employees quitting and unhappy clients, these embarrassing mistakes have taught me how to transform a loss only to become a better, more prepared person and allow for a big win.
It’s important to remember that when you’re feeling totally defeated, like you just can’t get a break, like maybe success isn’t meant for you, that’s when you’re really being called in to realize your power.
To help you stay focused on your success and handle setbacks with grace and (relative) ease, here are my top three tips to keep in mind when the chips are down:
Your ego may be tempting you to think this situation (that feels so horrible) defines your entire life, as if you just don’t have what it takes to be successful.
The truth is that any challenging situation is temporary, if you let it be.
When something unpleasant happens, or when our business ventures don’t turn out as we’ve dreamed, our ego likes to focus on it so much that we lose sight of all the good around it. Like when you get one negative Facebook comment, and suddenly it seems as if the whole world hates you, even if you have twenty letters in your inbox from people telling you how much they love your work!
If you stay in reality about what is true (that you love your work, that you’re meant for greatness, that plenty of people love what you have to offer) and regularly celebrate your accomplishments, then you will be much better at keeping perspective and pushing through when the cards don’t go your way.
In Western culture we have such a linear mindset, that when we think about a person going from A to Z, we imagine a direct line. Well the truth is that hardly anyone follows a clear-cut path to success! It’s more of a zig-zag, shimmy-shake, up-and-down kind of journey and it doesn’t always make perfect sense in the moment.
It’s important to remember that your destination is already set: you are pre-programmed for success. It’s effortless to accept the events of your life when you remember that there is no failure that can prevent you from fulfilling your potential. Open up to the idea that this moment is an opportunity to make tweaks, and get ready to try again. You might not know what exactly will be next, but you can absolutely trust it will be even better.
Remember that this is happening FOR you, not TO you. There hasn’t been a challenging situation in my life, whether it had to do with money, business, self-esteem, or romance, that wasn’t there to teach me something of massive value.
Thinking back on the programs I’ve launched that didn’t take off, or the events I hosted where not enough people showed up, the message I got was never that I was a failure, or that my life would always be that way.
Those experiences actually made me a more powerful, more in tune and more humble businesswoman today. The key was to discover what exactly I needed to learn in the moment.
To hear the right message, we have to push ourselves to ask tough questions. Were we Divinely guided, or were we doing something just because we could? Were we doing our visualizations, prayers, and meditations? If we did get Divine inspiration, did we really go into massive action and put forth the effort needed? And did we seek guidance from experts in the industry?
There are so many elements to being successful, but when we activate them, success becomes what the Course in Miracles calls effortless accomplishment. These “chips-are-down” seasons are meant to show us how. If you’re feeling defeated, I challenge you to dig deep and think about what it is that you might learn from this, so you that you can shift, course-correct, and go hit the jackpot.
It’s in the meditative space that we get to connect to our spiritual essence and feminine energy, opening ourselves up to truly Divine inspiration and finding our next move.
To help you turn defeat into possibility, try my collection of 10 Meditations for Miraculous Transformation, designed exclusively for women entrepreneurs.
| 1. Introduction:
Tapping Into The Miraculous Realm
|2. The Art of Relaxation|
|3. Say Yes to Sweet Success|
|4. The Freedom of Forgiveness|
|5. Loving Yourself Fully|
|6. Body Bliss|
|7. The Feminine Power of Gratitude|
|8. Transforming Your Relationship With Time|
|9. A Reflection On Financial Abundance|
|10. High Vibrational Health for Busy Women|
|11. Manifesting Miracles Today|